WHAT IS YOUR REACTIVE COPING STYLE?
Based on the book The Mindful Marriage. Learn more about the book by clicking here.
BLAME
SHAME
CONTROL
ESCAPE
Have you ever been in a situation where you are made to feel unimportant, unloved, or emotionally unsafe? We all have. But did you know that how you react to that feeling can affect how (or if) the situation is resolved?
Many people have a default reactive style--a sort of coping mechanism your brain triggers to protect you in a situation that feels unsafe. Take the assessment below to map your emotional reactivity. Once you know and understand your reactive style(s), you can learn how to manage your reactions to create your best relationship.
DIRECTIONS
Read each scenario below and then indicate which coping style is most similar to yours. The behaviors won’t be exactly like yours; just choose the one that is most like your typical reaction. If more than one resonates with you, check multiple boxes. Click the next button to navigate to the next scenario. Then enter your email address to receive your confidential results directly in your inbox.
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IN HARDCOVER, EBOOK AND AUDIO BOOK
Backed by neuroscience and biblical principles, this book delivers a therapeutic model for couples who want to stop the painful patterns in troubled relationships as well as healthy marriages, so that they can build a stronger connection.
When Ron and Nan Deal suffered the devastating loss of their child, their marriage was nearly shattered by their destructive cycles. At wits’ end, they sought the help of pioneering therapists Dr. Terry Hargrave and Sharon Hargrave, LMFT, whose transformational Restoration Therapy has helped millions through the practice of emotional mindfulness.
Now, the Deals and Hargraves introduce readers to this proven method that challenges popular beliefs about how relationships work. They show readers how to better understand themselves in times of emotional distress, so that they can self-regulate. Christian readers will especially appreciate the balance of scientifically proven methods along with Scripturally sound teaching, resulting in more loving, faithful marital relationships.
ABOUT THE AUTHORS
Ron Deal, MMFT, and Nan Deal, BSE, are popular conference speakers who lead marriage seminars based on Restoration Therapy and a small group for parents who have lost a child. Frequently featured in national media, Ron is the bestselling author of more than a dozen books and resources, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and host of the FamilyLife Blended® podcast. Nan retired from teaching after 25 years and currently works for Live Thankfully. They have three sons, a daughter-in-law, one grandson, and a Golden Retriever and reside in Little Rock, Arkansas. Learn more at RonDeal.org.
Terry Hargrave, PhD, and Sharon Hargrave, LMFT, are the founders of Restoration Therapy. Terry served as the Evelyn and Frank Freed Professor of Marriage and Family Therapy at Fuller Theological Seminary and has been training therapists for over 35 years. Sharon served as the Executive Director of the Boone Center for the Family at Pepperdine University, is the Founder of RelateStrong, and maintains a private practice. In their work together as authors, educators, conference speakers, retreat leaders, and trainers, they are passionate about helping people restore love and trust in marriages and families and building close, intimate and connected relationships. They reside in Arizona and have two adult married children and a growing number of grandchildren.
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